Defusing Tension

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In a team meeting my boss glances over as I respond to his decision. With a disagreeable tone I respond, “I have an idea, I’ll talk to you afterwards”. Immediately he snaps back, “No, I’m the boss and this is what we are doing”. Feeling like a 4th grader that just got into trouble with my Dad, I shut down and respond, “alright”.

That night I was walking as I reflected on the day. I got more and more frustrated with every step I took, finally coming to the conclusion that I should talk to my boss the next day about the incident. As soon as I walked into the office the next morning, he sits me down and speaks: “First of all, I have to apologize, I was too quick to respond and I did not hear you out. With that said, what was your idea?”.

A fly is able to walk on water because the tension is simply not enough to break the surface of the water. What happens when the fly adds a couple pounds? It drowns. When a tension arises that deals with another human being, often a social separation appears. As time passes, the emotional weight gets heavier and heavier as the tension becomes bigger and bigger. Soon, a once small problem become ginormous. My boss refused to let this happen as he diffused the situation with a difficult conversation.

What tension do you need to defuse?

Jake VaydaComment